


Anodyne

by nagisa-sensei (komaedakibou)



Category: South Park
Genre: Eric Cartman Being An Asshole, Established Relationship, Fluff, Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-25
Updated: 2017-10-22
Packaged: 2019-01-21 07:05:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,953
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12452196
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/komaedakibou/pseuds/nagisa-sensei
Summary: Tweek is going through mental turmoil in his attempts to change, but nobody aside from Craig seems to care enough to listen and help him through it.





	Anodyne

**Author's Note:**

> The newest creek episode of South Park plus my obsessive playing of South Park: The Fractured But Hole finally allowed me to give life to a South Park fic. Bless. Also I LOVE PROTECTIVE TWEEK!!!!

**_Anodyne;_ ** **_a drug used to lessen pain through reducing the sensitivity of the brain or nervous system._  
**

* * *

It had already been hours since the morning sunlight spilled into his room through slightly parted curtains, illuminating the previously pitch black room and alerting him to the official start of the day. Birds sang cheerful tunes, there was already a lot of activity that could be heard outside by both adults and children alike, and it was just another day in South Park with a new problem going to surface as it normally did.

The blond boy didn’t move however, not even thinking of putting any effort into getting out of his bed unless he absolutely had to. He sighed in exasperation, his tired eyes fully focused on the fidget spinner that Craig had gotten for him twirling on the tip of his finger effortlessly. Watching it spin calmed him down a lot more than he thought it would, but it didn’t make him feel any less depressed that morning or take away his desperate wish that he had to be anywhere but where he was at that moment.

Any feelings of safety that he’d previously had in his own home had all but disappeared; the more time he spent with his boyfriend, the more his eyes seemed to open to just how absolutely messed up things really had been for him and everyone else and that it wasn’t just simply in his head or exaggerated like most people wrote it off to be. So many crazy things had happened over the years, but he seemed to be the only person with the ability to notice that things were  _wrong_ , that the situations most of the people in town found themselves in just weren’t normal.

It just didn’t make sense to him. No matter what he saw or said, it seemed like nobody would ever believe a word that came out of his mouth and just viewed him as a special kind of crazy or a hopeless case... yet whenever people like Stan, Kyle, or even Eric said something that sounded ridiculous everyone would back them up or at least hear them out. It didn’t stop him from trying to speak up and get someone to listen to him, but it frustrated him to no end whenever it happened even if he was used to the treatment.

There had always been an awareness in his mind to just what extent the way South Park seemed to attract misfortune and the out of the ordinary – he liked to think he wasn’t  _that_  stupid or gullible – but he was so used to the way that things were that it had become natural for even him to just go with the flow and not question most occurrences. Any time he would go out of his way to question things nobody would listen to him in the first place, so he was used to his words going through one ear and right out the other.

For the longest time, he’d been treated as nothing more than a crazy nuisance by his peers and even his parents. With his parents being much more involved in his life than anyone else, he was more than accustomed to trying to reach out to them only for them to smile and dismiss him without paying his words much thought. Despite their treatment, he knew that they cared about him and were just... ignorant to how exactly they could actually be truly helpful to him since they never gave him a chance to speak his true feelings or take him seriously when he did.

At least that’s what he hoped. Everyone wanted to have a family that cared about them, that adored them and wanted what was best for them. Who else would put up with his annoying habits without simply dropping him and cutting him out of their lives? Aside from Craig, nobody had really tried to reach out to him before even if their relationship didn’t exactly start out nicely in the very beginning.

It was easy to convince himself that they did care about his well being, but it came increasingly harder once he thought about the way that they would always try to just shut him up with coffee and use him to test their little drug experiments. The longer he sat there and analysed his relationship with them, the more it seemed as though they only really paid genuine attention to him when he was doing something for their benefit. And he was, quite frankly,  _completely sick of it._

On most days, especially for the past few weeks, the fear of being thrust into another taste testing session by his parents kept him immobolised in bed. If he left at the last possible moment to go to school, the chances of either of his parents bothering him was drastically reduced if they were still home, even if he knew that his luck wouldn’t hold out for him very long. It still gave him peace of mind, and for a little while it felt as though his mind was clear and he could really think  _rationally_  without intrusive thoughts impeding his progress.

Without coffee being forced on him, he felt as though he could slowly move towards not having it as often as he was used to and maybe actually feel better. His racing thoughts, general paranoia and stifling anxiety were all only amplified under the caffeine’s effects, something that he’d only realised once his time wasn’t merely spent in the company of his family at home or at work in the coffee shop.

It would take a long time to recover for sure, but he was determined to start making a change in his life. And if his determination ever wavered, having Craig by his side made him feel like perhaps the seemingly impossible really might be possible after all. No matter how hard it was, he had already been able to do so many things that he couldn’t before with the other boy’s help, support and company, so his faith was strong.

Taking a glance at the time, he sighed loudly once again as he finally forced himself to get out of bed and slowly made his way to his wardrobe in order to prepare himself for the day. Tiredness hung over him like a heavy rain cloud since he fell asleep late and woke up early, but he wouldn’t resort to coffee to fuel him no matter how tempted he was. The liquid was just a temporary relief which was something he was well aware of, and the stuff would have him shaking like a leaf in no time instead of being as steady as he was. The stillness didn’t come often so he wanted to relish in it and stay that way for as long as he could possibly manage.

That night, he’d have to do his best to actually try and get a decent sleep so his chances of improving were even higher. It was amazing that he was even able to sit there without twitching at all, especially since his dreams – nightmares, rather – had harshly woke him up at an ungodly hour and had him too scared to even attempt to sleep again. It might be difficult to do, but if he planned his day well once he got home then it wouldn’t be impossible to do.

Getting his clothes ready, he rummaged through the wardrobe to find a clean set of his usual get-up, taking his time to carefully lay them out on his bed and getting his shoes and socks ready. Anything that dragged out the amount of time it took him to get ready was more than fine by him. Procrastination wasn’t something he really practiced often, but his avoidance of his parents and all coffee related things was making him a pro at it. As he put on his pants, socks and shoes in an extremely overly careful way, he thought that perhaps he’d actually end up looking presentable for once and wondered if anyone would even care or notice. Probably not, aside from Craig, but then again Craig was the only one whose opinion that mattered to him anyway.

As he buttoned up his shirt however, a gentle knock at his bedroom door made him jump and yelp, his hands trembling and messing up the order as per usual. A million different thoughts seemed to surface at once, making his fingers reach up to softly tug at his blond locks in an attempt to quiet his racing mind. All of his previous thoughts were lost and forgotten, now replaced with the simple question of  _who the hell was knocking at his door right before he had to leave for school?_  There really were only two answers since Craig would have simply waltzed in like he normally did, so it just  _had_  to be one of his parents.

For a brief, weak moment, he contemplated opening the window and making his great escape out of it before they came in. What were the chances of him being okay after jumping out of a two story window? Not good, he assumed… but that didn’t make the temptation any less great or do anything to put a halt to his longing glances toward it. It  _was_  snowing outside, so maybe if he planned it just right he would be okay despite the height. It was the only other escape he had and he was definitely willing to take the risk in his current state of mind if it was necessary.

His feet took him towards it as quietly as he could, his trembling hands fumbling with the latch and opening it  _just in case_ , but by the time there was enough space for him to fit through he heard the doorknob to his room turning at a painfully slow speed. Whoever it was wanted to give him a chance to tell them not to come in, but his voice failed him and his racing thoughts wouldn’t let anything out other than a distressed scream. Well, now they definitely knew he was there and aware of them, but he still wondered if it would be possible for him to hide no matter how ridiculous that would be. He knew that whoever it was would’ve been waiting for him and wouldn’t have come to him unless they knew he was there for certain.

“Tweek… Son?” The familiar, calm voice of his father called out gently, faux concern in his tone. He recognised it right away as the way he spoke when he wanted something but was also worried, so he would hide it behind concerned looks and words that he may or may not have even meant. Gritting his teeth, he prepared to get  _extremely_  annoyed; Richard was the one who gave him coffee the most, much more than his mother ever had. “How are you feeling? You haven’t been getting out of bed until it’s almost time to leave lately, so I’ve been worried…”

Tweek turned around just in time to see the man hide something behind his back, but he knew exactly what it was. The familiar ‘ _Tweek Bros Coffee’_  logo on their foam take-away cups was something he’d seen millions of times, so he’d be able to notice it absolutely anywhere. It seemed as though his father had brought him coffee to wake him up, even if without a doubt it also had something else in it especially for him. Just the sight of it made him take a step towards the window once again, but looking down from where he was an imagining jumping out terrified him much more than a drink ever could.

“Argh…!” He cried out, tugging his hair a little harder and slamming the window shut once again. Coffee really was the last thing he wanted, but he couldn’t expect him to know that when he hadn’t told anyone of his growing hatred of it. It was his father’s go-to comfort drink to make anything negative go away, so of course poor Tweek was too afraid to tell him straight forwardly that he didn’t want it anymore. Plus, it didn’t help that he had the ever growing fear that his parents really would hate him for not sharing their love of coffee anymore since he had no idea how else they would possibly react to it. “I’m just… just tired… but I need to go now!”

Hands falling from his hair to his sides with a dull thud against the material of his clothes, he made an attempt to make his exit through the door behind his father before he could say anything. The moment he was in touching range though, a firm hand was placed on his shoulder and caused him to look up to see what he hoped was real worry in his father’s eyes. The moment was lost when Richard smiled, procuring the cup of poorly hidden coffee and offering it wordlessly and expectantly. With a far too shaky hand, he succumbed to the pressure and averted his eyes, taking the cup quickly and almost dropping it in the process.

With a few pats on the shoulder, that hand weighing him down was finally gone and he was free. The weight of the decision he had to make kept him rooted to the spot, so all he could do was hope the man didn’t expect to  _see_  him drinking it. It would be many steps back in his progress, especially when he knew that once he got a taste that he wouldn’t be able to resist anymore. Wide eyes pleaded that his father actually asked what was wrong instead of makings assumptions, but he knew that the words he needed and wanted to hear were not going to be said by him.

“You should drink that to wake up, son,” Richard suggested far too happily, like he really felt like he was doing something great for his son. The satisfied look on his face made the boy both angry and nervous, knowing that he really did need to say something eventually so his father would stop thinking it was okay to keep doing the things he was. As easy as it should have been to simply take the cup and commit to throwing it away, the delicacy being really in his hand made him really want to submit to his urges. “I’ll bring you up a cup tomorrow morning as well just in case you don’t sleep well again, what do you say about that?”

Tweek had  _a lot_  of things to say about that, none of them nice or appropriate to be saying to someone with authority over him. It took a lot of self-restraint to stop himself from crushing the cup in an emotional outburst, but he somehow managed to grind his teeth and remain quiet. When his father mistook a violent twitch of his as approval, the door was no longer being obtruded and he was granted freedom… but at what price? He’d regret biting his tongue later, but he  _was_  starting to run late for school, so he wordlessly traipsed out of the room and down the stairs.

With how warm the cup in his hand was, Richard must have prepared it and had been expecting him ages ago. How was he supposed to approach the topic and tell his parents ‘no’ without initiating a fight? They’d grown so used to him just blindly doing whatever they said and wanted without question. It didn’t matter to them or him how much it hurt, how much it killed his tastebuds and made his head feel like it had been trampled on by a stampede of cows.

He’d mull it over for the whole day for sure, even if he didn’t really find a solution to his problem. Perhaps talking it over with someone would help, but he didn’t want to end up bothering Craig since he couldn’t exactly trust many other people. Maybe Token could help…? It depended on how his day went, but he thought that maybe it would be good to get the opinion of someone that he didn’t normally ask for help from. Craig would just have a blunt and logical answer anyway, like ‘just tell them and get it out there’, or something along those lines.

The foam cup weighed heavy in his hand, his thoughts quickly honing in on it and the sweet smell emanating from it. Even though he held it far away from his body and did his best to ignore it, his ears somehow were able to notice the sound of the liquid moving around with every step he took. It only proved to make it even harder to ignore and made him walk in longer strides in order to reach the school even quicker. To make it easier, he stared at the ground beneath him and counted the steps he took, trying to focus his ears on any other sound that was loud enough to drown out the one that taunted him so.

For the entire duration of his walk from home to school, he was completely on edge. Even with him focusing on the sounds around him, he still got startled as easily as he always did and had trouble regulating his breathing; he hoped it would become easier once he actually reached his destination. It might just be wishful thinking on his part, but he knew once it wasn’t at the forefront of his mind any longer that he’d at least improve  _a little bit,_ which was good enough for him. Without noticing, however, the cup somehow grew closer and closer to his lips the more that he walked.

Once he reached the entrance of the school, it was so close that he had to really think about whether or not he’d taken a drink from it. Upon further inspection, the rim of the cup didn’t _appear_  to have any marks or signs of someone drinking from it but he still had his doubts. Was it possible for him to have drunk from it without actually knowing? He was sure he’d notice something like that or snap out of his reverie once the taste hit him, but then again he was so used to it that sometimes he tasted nothing at all. Shaking his head, he figured it was in his imagination and opened the main door, stepping inside.

Loitering in the doorway, he played with the hem of his shirt with his free hand and closed his eyes. Breathing was important at times like these, and he wasn’t about to turn on his decision that he’d made with a clear mind now that it was fogged. He couldn’t help but wish that Craig was around to stop him, even if he really did have to learn how to resist it all on his own if he wanted to make  _real_  progress. Plus, the other boy wasn’t going to be around him 24/7 just to stop him from making extremely poor life decisions.

All effort he had put into calming himself down went to waste the moment the door behind him suddenly flung open and someone barged in at top speed, sending him barrelling towards the wall with a strangled cry. The force was so strong that he had to choose to save himself or the coffee, but the contents of the cup ended up spilling all over the front of his shirt as he tried to reach out for something to keep him steady. At least it solved his problem – no longer would he stand there deliberating over what he should do with the cup; it was mostly empty and half crushed, so it didn’t even need to be thought about.

With a sigh, he was at least happy that the liquid wasn’t hot enough to scald him; it just felt icky and uncomfortable and he wanted to take it off. There was no way to do that without walking home or seeing the counsellor, but he didn’t want to do either of those things. His father would be extremely upset with him about what happened and just offer him another drink, and he wouldn’t even dream of going deeper into the school looking the way that he did. Both were horrible options, yet he had to choose one eventually whether he liked it or not. Biting his lip and putting the cup on the ground so he wouldn’t destroy it further, a small whimper escaped him as he leaned against the wall and tugged at his hair.

“Tweek?” A soft hand cautiously rubbed the top of his back, the familiar deep voice gently calling out to him with a hint of concern. Without thinking, he moved to turn around and bury his face in his boyfriend’s jacket, but he stopped once he remembered he was covered in coffee. Craig looked down at him with a small frown, his mouth forming a thin line as he took in the sight with an inaudible sigh. After a few moments of silence Craig placed his hands on his shoulders, making him look up at the other questioningly. “Tweek, honey... what happened?”

"Nnn..." At first, he couldn't bring himself to say anything intelligible and he lowered his head so the embarrassment wasn't easily visible as Craig started to unbutton his shirt. It wasn't exactly out of the ordinary for him to be doing that so he paid it no mind; he'd grown used to the taller boy fixing his shirt on occasion, even if it would be pointless to button it up at that point because of that huge stain on it. Still, he paid it no heed and tried to gather his thoughts to answer the question. "My dad... gave me coffee and I didn't want to drink it... but when I got to school and decided to throw it away, someone bumped me and I... this happened..."

Once the mess of an explanation was said, he looked up and wondered if he should be less vague about it. That did basically cover what happened, but he definitely could have said it much better than he did. From the corner of his eye, the sight of Cartman making gagging motions kept him silent and made him grit his teeth. Anger rose up within him; he thought that they were over all the teasing of them being gay, but he did his best to ignore it.

Honestly, he felt as though his entire day had been completely ruined and school hadn't even started yet. It didn't matter what he did from them on, he would no doubt be made into a laughingstock and get many comments about the obsession with coffee that he didn't even really have. Craig simply hummed in thought, gently moving his arms so he could remove his shirt. It made him snap back to reality once his chest was bare, his eyes frantically looking up at the other for some sort of explanation.

Craig blinked, face expressionless as he crumpled it into a ball and used his water bottle to wet it, dabbing it on his chest to remove as much of the stickiness from the coffee as he could. Once there was nothing more he could do to help in that regard, he unzipped his own jacket so he could put it on Tweek instead. It was too big for him and only the tips of his fingers were visible beneath the sleeves, but it was so cute that he couldn't help but smile.

"Well, at least you're okay. If I find out who did it, I'll beat them up," Craig finally said, brushing Tweek's hair out of his eyes and letting his hand linger near the other's now very red cheeks. To hide his ever growing smile of fondness, he quickly pressed a kiss to the blond boy's forehead before putting his attention on the stained shirt in his hand that he uncrumpled and then folded as neatly as he could, putting it in his backpack. "For now though... I'm keeping this with me and washing it for you after school. So you should come over and spend the day with me."

Even if it seemed impossible for his cheeks to get any redder, the heat he felt in his face increased at an incredible rate as he snuggled into the warmth of the other's jacket. The feeling of lips against his forehead still lingered, making him feel all warm and fuzzy inside. A big grin was on his face now, all negative thoughts slipping away as though his boyfriend had somehow placed a protective shield around him. Finally indulging in his want to nuzzle the other's chest, he closed the distance between them and mumbled a small thank you as a gentle hand ruffled his hair fondly.

"Well, well, well... look at what we have here," the annoying voice of Cartman rang out before Tweek had a chance to speak up, making him jump and back away from the comforting embrace. With a glare, Tweek prepared himself for an argument or some sort of fight to break out; even if he wasn't so big on violence, he would do what needed to be done if the situation called for it. And honestly, it was pretty easy to set him off, especially when his boyfriend was involved. "Hey faggots, why don't you take your homosexual shit somewhere else? People like  _me_ \- heterosexual, normal people, that is -shouldn't have to suffer this gross shit."

"Fuck off, Cartman," Craig replied and flipped him off, rolling his eyes and turning away so as not to encourage him further. Whatever was going on with Cartman probably had nothing to do with them, and Tweek was sure that if he responded that it would only get worse, but hearing comments like that only further fuelled the anger that he already had. "Don't listen to him, babe, he's just-"

"Just  _what?_ " Cartman seethed, already offended by the unsaid words. The distance between them and him was quickly shortened as he put himself in their personal space with an accusatory finger. His eyes zoned in on Craig specifically, a smirk creeping onto his face. "You know what, Craig? I don't think I like your attitude, so I'm gonna have to teach you a lesson. I don't care about how you think you're  _hot shit,_  you're just a stupid little gay prick who needs to just disappear and  _die already_."

"Don't touch my Craig!" When Catman's finger disappeared and he put his hand threateningly close to Craig, Tweek had  _enough_. With a small growl he took a fistful of the other's jacket, using all of his strength to push the large mass of weight into the wall beside them. "I don't know what the fuck is wrong with you, Cartman, but take your problems somewhere else and leave us alone!" 

Cartman was shocked above anything else, a plethora of emotion on his face before it fell to rage, lifting his hands up to push Tweek away in protest. Before those hands touched the blond though, his attention was pointed to Craig who looked like he would step in at any moment. Though Tweek's sudden willingness to fight caught him off guard, it was common knowledge to all that Craig liked to fight and cause trouble... and even if he wouldn't admit it, he knew a physical fight wouldn't end well for him. He'd need back up in order to take them on, or a plan to get what he wanted another way.

"Whatever... screw you guys," he eventually said, pushing Tweek away from him with his shoulder and returning distance between them before either of them could retaliate. "But don't think you can just get away with your gay shit. Holding hands everywhere is one thing, but fucking stripping each other in the hallway? You're not going to get away with  _that_  easily, so don't get used it."

Craig smirked briefly before picking up the cup of coffee off the floor, throwing it into the nearest rubbish bin before returning to his boyfriend and opening his arms welcomingly. It wasn't often that he really initiated or welcomed physical contact at all, especially in public, but the blond was slowly starting to realise what he'd done and he knew it would be hard to calm him down otherwise. Cartman was an asshole, after all, so there was no telling what he'd do in retaliation. They'd deal with it when it came, so comforting him became his top priority. 

"Come here, Wonder Tweek," he cooed softly, letting out a small ' _oomph_ ' when the other heavily fell into him and wrapped his arms around him protectively. Tweek looked up at him with his brow furrowed in determination, a small pout on his lips. "There, there. Don't let that asshole get to you, he just wants attention, like always."

Of course, Tweek knew he was right. It didn't make it any easier for him to hear, especially since he was well aware of what Cartman was like and the horrid things he was capable of doing. The boy was a psychopath who had done so many horrible things and would certainly do greater and even more awful things in the near  _and_  distant future. He grumbled against Craig's shirt, his voice muffled as he calmed himself down the best that he could. The day was definitely going to be a long one, so he wanted to enjoy the small time alone he had with the other before something else inevitably happened to make his day even worse.

**Author's Note:**

> If you enjoyed or have any constructive criticism since this is my first time trying to write in this fandom, comments and kudos are very much appreciated!


End file.
